Harry Potter and the Sonic Screwdriver
by FlamingLemonJellyMonsterRawr
Summary: After his repeated attempts to win Rose back from his human counterpart fail, The Doctor decides to travel a little further afield in search of companionship.
1. Chapter 1

_Somewhere in the known universe_

The Doctor was lonely. Some days, he felt like he was _always_ lonely. For some reason, in spite of his undeniable good looks and winning personality, his friends never seemed to hang around for long.

But, the Doctor had_ A Plan_. And _The Plan_ was going to change all of that. The Doctor was very proud of his Plan. He thought it was the best plan he'd ever had, even better than the time just last week that he'd thought up the Amazing, Cool and Charming Plan to win Rose back from his human counterpart by showing up dressed as Prince Charming and serenading her.

The Doctor remembered that he had Promised Not To Think About That. EVER again.

And anyway, it didn't matter, because the new plan was this: The Doctor was going to travel to a parallel dimension in his TARDIS!

Well, OK, maybe it wasn't the most _original_ plan ever, but that didn't matter, because this plan was going to be a success. The Doctor had even chosen where he wanted to land. He'd always liked Scotland, so he was going to the parallel Scotland. Personally, he was hoping to meet a real haggis, the animal not the foodstuff.

Convinced that this plan was going to work out just fine, The Doctor set off.

-

_At Hogwarts_

Harry Taylor was lonely. Killing the Dark Lord Hildemort should clearly have gotten him _loads_ of girls. But for some reason, they just didn't seem to fancy him. And ever since his two supposed best friends, Non Jonsley and Camione Granger had started going out, they always seemed to be sneaking off, making excuses like "we need to go to see Snapelow about our potions homework" or "Jaco Malward needs to talk to us". Harry wasn't stupid. He could tell they were having a secret love affair.

As he wandered miserably through Hogwarts, he was shocked to hear a really loud, grating sound. It sounded like many cats being scraped along a chalkboard. Not that Harry knew what that would sound like... anyway, it was a horrible sound. Harry pulled out his wand and cast a spell to protect himself from... loud noises. It seemed like a sensible thing to do.

Suddenly, a blue box began to materialise in front of Harry. "What a horribly inefficient portkey," Harry thought. "It takes _ages _to appear, and it's much too loud." Whoever owned that box needed to come back to Hogwarts.

And then,the door opened, and out walked the most incredibly good looking man Harry had ever seen in his whole entire life.


	2. Chapter 2

The Doctor was pleased to see a rather attractive, if someone slack-jawed young man waiting to greet him. This was probably the most friendly version of Scotland he'd ever visited. He'd been here a good ten seconds and not one drunk had tried to get a punch in.

"Hello!" he said in his uber-sexy (in his humble opinion) Scottish accent. "I'm the Doctor."

The young man didn't seem bright enough to talk. Perhaps the Doctor's co-ordinates had gotten a bit jumbled, and this was in fact a tongue-less-- but no, the young man began to speak just as the Doctor began to think of the possibilities.

"I'm Harry Taylor, um, Doctor. Are you sure you don't mean Healer? Only, Doctor seems pretty muggle, and you know, I don't think anyone's even hurt, and Madam Lomfrey-" The Doctor could see that thinking too hard would hurt poor Harry's brain.

"Perhaps you'd better take me to whoever is in charge, Harry?" he suggested with a smile.

"Oh, Professor Rumblefore." Harry seemed relieved. "Yes, I can take you to him, sir. Follow me."

Harry reached out and took the Doctor's hand, then blushed bright red as he realised what he was doing, before snatching his hand away again. "Um... this way," he pointed.

The Doctor felt bad for Harry, as the poor boy was clearly confused. But then again, who could blame him? The Doctor was devilishly handsome.

-

Harry was beginning to think that Professor Rumblefore had moved office further than usual just to spite him, and was wondering whether to stop and ask for directions when Professor Steverus Snapelow came out of nowhere. "Mr Taylor," he said in his deceptively calm voice, "Why is your shirt not tucked in?"

Harry could feel himself turning even redder. "Sorry, sir," he mumbled as he fiddled with his shirt and continued to walk, as quickly as he could without running.

"Who was that?" The so-called Doctor called after him, catching up easily.

"The most fanciable male in the school," Harry muttered, and refused to say any more on the subject.

Finally, they reached Rumblefore's office. Harry was relieved, and decided to make a quick getaway.

"Krispy Kreme," he told the gargoyle, then ran inside the office before he could embarrass himself any more.

The Doctor stared after him. "What a very strange young man," he said. "He's quite fit, though." With a cheery shrug, the doctor followed him up.


End file.
